Apocalypse, Dates, and Changes

Isadora is spending the night with her aunt tonight so if I don’t post to my poetry blog in the morning it is because I am enjoying date time with Sam =) Isadora hasn’t spent the night with anyone in a long time so I do wonder how she’ll do? She’s done well in the past so we will see.

This week I feel like I am seeing some physical changes in my body, maybe it is wishful thinking but it is nevertheless motivating!

What I am not doing well is coping with stress. I spend a lot of time worrying about the end of the world (I have some sort of phobia about the Apocalypse) and just the whole boob/cervix thing. With the the boob/cervix issue if I get normal results then I should relax, at least until the next exam but the Apocalypse thing I have no clue how to stop worrying about it much less why I worry about it as often as I do. Sometimes I think I am crazy, like not the funny, brilliant crazy but the tinfoil hat crazy. These aren’t the only things I worry about of course, but my thoughts have been pretty obsessive lately. I am doing everything healthy I can think of to relieve the stress exercise, eating well, meditating, breathing, getting plenty of rest, centering on the present, the techniques my therapist suggested you name it but I seem to be trapped in some chronic state of worry. Some of my worries stem from stuff that is actually happening and that others might also perceive as stressful and other stuff is NOT happening and is BEYOND my reckoning or control even if it were to occur. I guess most of worrying is imaginary and because I have a good imagination I am doomed to venture in too deep.

My yoga workout this morning was all preparing for handstand sort of stuff so it was quite a lot of upper body strength work. I am actually too scared to do a handstand at the moment (I can do a headstand) but I do the prep work and strength building components. My Pilates workout was easy to follow and I did everything as it is shown in the video, a balanced routine.


3 responses

    • There are of course environmental factors and scenarios. I am worried about certain political leaders coming into power and the government in general not that I am particularly political but what I hear sometimes scares me. I worry about all the various terrorist groups. I worry about the eye for eye mentality we’ve got going. I worry about all the school shootings. I know there have been serious issues in every age but there are just so many people now (so I guess overpopulation, limited resources). So many people taking, taking, taking and living in fear and a kind of malevolent apathy. I also worry about random events like meteors and planets being knocked out of orbit and the super volcanoes going off POP POP POP Oh and the weather, it has been so irregular and I don’t trust it haha

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