I am just a person you know?

conformity

I am not certain that I can effectively express my thoughts here so bare with me.

 

People often question the way in which I live my life. Providing useful cough advice on how I can remedy my situation. Never mind that I am a sentient being with my own personal destiny. Never mind that they are dissatisfied with the very predicament they wish for me to emulate.

People often question the motives behind my actions and choices.

When I’ve made a mistake people want to know why and until I can provide them with the answer they are looking for they do not appear to move on. Whether they need an excuse to hate or forgive the answer they seek must conform to either their illusions of me and/or their illusions of self. No matter how sincerely I try to answer if my answer doesn’t fall within their range it will be refuted truth or not.

People are always pruning one another. Little criticisms here and there to keep one another “in line” so to speak. Ironically most people are dissatisfied with the very aspects of society that they most vigorously impose.

We’re so used to being forced to excuse every aspect of our being that we end up forming elaborate philosophies to justify our behaviors. We develop these immobile and elaborate constructs of self, like some sort fucked up Avatar that we spend every waking moment of our lives guarding. Anyone who challenges our construct is seen as a threat. In some cases the challenger might mean us harm but all too often we avoid stimulating and invigorating relationships because they threaten to expose our false idols.

The ego makes us believe that the world revolves around “I”. Is your lover upset? Before we’ve exchanged so much as a word Ego is already suiting up for war. Fuck listening we’re too busy trying to intuit what we’ve done so we can either repair the damage or deflect/divert blame. Even if their problem has nothing to do with us it still has everything to do with us because Ego takes everything personally.

 

My conclusions humans make even the simplest situations hysterically complicated. If we stopped trying so hard to look intelligent we might not act so fucking stupid.

 

I ate your muffin because it looked good and I was hungry not because I hate you. Not because I lack respect. Not because it is my purpose in life to abolish all of muffin kind. There is no excuse I am a muffin stealing bastard end of.